Chapter Fourteen

The grounds of the Pembrook Theater looked like a sea of colorful masts as picnic blankets in a wild array of colors adorned the grassy hillside. It was a lovely end-of-summer night with a perfect 72-ish temp and a gentle breeze coming off the lake. As was the custom, people had brought picnic dinners and many of them were incredibly elaborate. Sarah loved to sneak a peek at all the different foods as she strolled around trying to find the perfect spot to lay out her quilt.

If truth be told, Sarah had been having mixed feelings about this whole "un-date" with Brad. On the one hand, she was thrilled to be able to see her favorite singer, Josh Groban, in concert. This would be the fourth time she had been able to see him perform live and she had never left disappointed. However, on the other hand, she was going with Brad and she had tried very hard to keep their relationship congenial but not too congenial. Since his divorce, he had earned a bad reputation for being a bit of a playboy and, in the past, that type of man had tended to be her undoing. She liked the way they were comfortable in their skin and comfortable with her skin. Those types of men tended to know their way around  a female body. Unfortunately, they also tended to know lots of females...and that was KNOW in the biblical sense. After a while, that wandering eye always wandered elsewhere and left Sarah feeling used like yesterday's dishes. As soon as Brad moved in next door, it was if he had a flashing neon warning light tattooed on his forehead screaming "DANGER!" She liked him like cotton candy....a little is lovely but she knew that large doses could be lethal.

Brad had sent her ticket to her via a messenger this afternoon, telling her he had a deal that was closing but that he would find her on the lawn. Brad owned a high-end real estate firm and he was always either closing a deal or about to close a deal or hoping to close a deal. He offered to bring dinner but Sarah insisted that the food would be her contribution to the evening. She liked cooking savory dishes even though baking was her first love. Creating a menu for a picnic was always a bit of a challenge. After all, one had to be able to serve and eat food while sitting on the ground and balancing a plate on your lap. Being a tad clumsy herself, Sarah was extremely cognizant of the messiness factor when creating her menu.

First, she made broiled tuna steaks with a wasabi cream sauce. The tuna was actually best served at room temperature so it would be perfect for the picnic dinner. Then she made a rustic pasta salad filled with broccoli florets and red pepper strips and black olives and lightly dressed in a balsamic vinaigrette.
Last, but hardly least, she brought 4 different cup cakes which they could sample and share: Brad's current favorite, RhuBarbie and Fen (a rhubarb cupcake with a cream cheese frosting with a hint of fennel), her number one seller: Sarah's Sanity (an insane combination of peanut butter cake and a chocolate ganache icing), the Lemon-Lavender cupcakes that Brad had taste-tested a few weeks earlier and a surprise cupcake that she had been working on perfecting.

As soon as Sarah found a spot that suited her, she began to unload the picnic basket and organize their meal. Like clockwork, Brad appeared at the top of the hill nearest her as she finished laying out the last item. She waved to show him where she was located, and he quickly made his way around the other concert goers to take his place on the quilt next to her.

"How did you find me? There must be over 500 people here already!"

"I have a great nose. I just sniffed around for the best food."

"Funny. Am I blushing? Seriously, how did you find me so fast?"

"Sarah, you and I are in sync."

"The band?"

"Ha! No,  we're  on the same wavelength. We dance to the same beat. I am the Zip to your Zap, the Ying to your Yang...."

"The peanut butter to my jelly?"

"Exactly!"

Sarah laughed. "You are incredibly full of shit. Are there really women out there who fall for those lines?"

"You would be surprised how easy it is to woo a woman."

"Why is that?"

"I'm no Dr. Phil, but if you seriously want to know what I think, I'll tell you."

Sarah nodded and motioned her hand for him to continue.

"I think it has to do with the way society sends a message to women..starting when they're girls, that sets a standard for them that is almost impossible to reach. If a man understands this, he can get any woman he wants to spread her legs for him."

"Ugh. That's really classy, Brad."

"OK...I know it sounds awful but women are socialized to believe that they are fundamentally lacking. We sell them millions of products to take hair off and take weight off and add weight to other areas..."

"Like boobs and butts?"

"Exactly. Women are supposed to be built like part Twiggy and part Beyonce."

"Not exactly a realistic goal for most people."

"Right. So that is where the lover of women comes in."

"You mean that is where he takes advantage of the fragile egos?"

"The societally damaged egos."

"OK. Then what?"

"Then he consistently and persistently tries to undo all of the media's messages in her head. He tells her she is thin enough and endowed enough and her hair is straight enough or curly enough and her skin is clear enough or tan enough."

"So he tells her what she wants to hear in order to get in her pants."

"No, it isn't as sinister as all that. He isn't making things up. She is perfect. He's just telling the truth."

Sarah tried to buy herself some time by putting the food on the plates she brought and pouring them each a glass of the chilled Sauvignon Blanc. She was really hating Brad a few seconds ago. She could feel her heart beat racing as she prepared to call him out for his insanely antiquated chauvinist words. But then, somehow, it sort of turned around and ended up someplace....well... sweet. Clearly, her radar was on the fritz. She really couldn't tell the good guys from the bad guys anymore.

After tons of compliments on the dinner, Brad suggested that they take a little break before indulging in the cupcakes. The warm-up act had ended and Josh Groban was taking the stage. Sarah tried to find a comfortable position but no pose felt completely right.

"Allow me," Brad said gallantly as he crossed his legs and put a pillow Sarah had brought with the quilt into his lap. He gently guided her shoulders downward and she lay back resting her head on the pillow. It was a surprisingly comfortable pose.

"You have all the moves, my friend."

"They come in handy sometimes."

The moon shining overhead, Groban's sweet melodies caressing her ears, Sarah was feeling unbelievably content. It didn't hurt that Brad had also been gently massaging her shoulders. She felt loose and liquidy like one of her batters. She must have drifted off into a light sleep because she was having a dream that she and Brad were in bed...together. WHen she jolted awake, there was a loud bang as their jaws collided. Apparently, he was leaning down to give her a soft kiss on her forehead just as she awakened.

"Shit!" Brad screamed. "Why'd you do that?"

"Ow! What were you doing? I fell asleep. I must have jumped up when I was waking up.
Why were you hovering?"

Brad looked slightly sheepish. "OK. Not hovering. You just looked so peaceful. I don't know. Something made me want to kiss you."

At this point, Sarah was sitting up and they were facing each other. "Ok...this is certainly awkward," she thought. So, she did what she always did when life got weird, "Time for cupcakes!"